The Tribe

07.14.2023 – The Importance of Community As an individual in recovery, I understand the immense importance of community support in my journey towards healing and sobriety. Being part of a supportive community has been instrumental in my recovery, providing a lifeline of understanding, acceptance, and encouragement. Here's how community support has specifically benefited me: 1. Understanding and Acceptance: Within the recovery community, I have found a safe space where I can openly share my experiences without fear of judgment. Being surrounded by peers who have walked a similar path creates a sense of understanding and acceptance that I had longed for. Knowing that I am not alone in my struggles has been incredibly comforting and has made me feel validated in my journey. 2. Peer Support and Accountability: The support and accountability from fellow community members have been invaluable. Connecting with others who are also committed to sobriety has provided a strong support network. Through support groups and mutual encouragement, we hold each other accountable and provide a listening ear during challenging times. The shared experiences and empathy within the community have motivated me to stay committed to my recovery goals. 3. Shared Recovery Tools and Strategies: Being part of a recovery community has exposed me to a wealth of recovery tools and strategies. Peers who have successfully overcome substance abuse and alcohol addiction have shared their experiences, offering insights and practical advice. Their wisdom has guided me in developing coping mechanisms, creating healthier habits, and navigating the ups and downs of recovery. Listening to the ones that have gone before me is an absolute must. 4. Relapse Prevention: The community has played a vital role in my relapse prevention efforts. Within this supportive network, I have learned to identify triggers, manage cravings, and recognize warning signs of potential relapse. Through ongoing communication and support, community members have helped me develop effective strategies to overcome challenges and maintain my sobriety. I did have one setback with nonprescription medication that forced a new sobriety date, but that does not discount the support and love of my tribe. 5. Non-judgmental Environment: One of the most significant benefits of community support is the non-judgmental environment it provides. Free from stigma and discrimination, I have been able to share my story honestly and openly. This acceptance has allowed me to heal from the shame and guilt associated with my disease, fostering self-compassion and a sense of belonging. I have also learned because of one singular personal experience that there are some people in the rooms that will judge me, and form opinions of behavior and my honesty based on observation of a computer screen over Zoom. Being that I cannot control the actions of another, I turned this over to my higher power and used the experience as a positive by being mindful of how my body feels and my emotions going into a meeting (kind of like the Northpoint IOP check-in exercise) and intentionally being more engaged on Zoom and in in-person meetings. 6. Building Healthy Relationships: Alcohol addiction often strains relationships, leading to isolation. However, being part of a recovery community has given me the opportunity to build healthy relationships with like-minded individuals. These connections are based on shared experiences and the mutual goal of sobriety. The support and camaraderie within the community have helped me rebuild a positive social network and find companionship on my journey. 7. Access to Resources and Treatment: The recovery community and Northpoint have provided me with access to various resources and treatment options that have been instrumental in my recovery journey. Whether it's counseling services, therapy, support group meetings, or educational workshops, the community has connected me to the necessary tools for my healing and growth. The availability of these resources within the community has been a challenge at times, but the ones I have been able to engage with have been key to my personal recovery. 8. Empowerment and Inspiration: Witnessing the personal transformations and successes of others within the community has been incredibly empowering and inspiring. Celebrating milestones together and supporting each other's progress has fostered resilience, self-belief, and a sense of possibility. The community has shown me that recovery is not only attainable but also a journey of personal growth and empowerment. Being part of a supportive community has been a lifeline in my recovery from my addiction. It has provided understanding, peer support, shared recovery tools, relapse prevention strategies, a non-judgmental environment, opportunities for building healthy relationships, access to resources and treatment, as well as empowerment and inspiration. Through active participation in this community, I have found strength, resilience, and the necessary support to rebuild my life and embrace a fulfilling, sober future. I think about everybody in the recovery community daily and hope that they are all taking advantage of the recovery community and experiencing the joy and happiness that those relationships bring. With Strength and Honor.

Acceptance and Trauma

07.13.2023 – Acceptance and Trauma During my recovery journey, one painful truth I confronted was how the childhood trauma I experienced within my family had contributed to my struggles with alcohol. The trauma had left deep emotional wounds that I initially sought to numb and escape through drinking. The memories and emotions associated with the trauma were overwhelming and often unbearable. In those moments, alcohol became a temporary refuge—a way to dull the pain, quiet the memories, and momentarily find shelter from the pain. It provided a false sense of relief, numbing the raw emotions that I wasn't ready or equipped to face at the time. However, as I progressed through my recovery, I began to recognize the destructive cycle I had fallen into. Alcohol was not a solution or a source of healing; it was merely masking the pain and prolonging my journey towards true recovery. I realized that to truly get better, I needed to confront the trauma head-on, process the emotions, and find healthier ways to cope. Use the tools that were given to me inpatient at Northpoint and in IOP afterwards. It was a challenging and courageous decision to confront the trauma without relying on alcohol as a remedy. I sought professional help and therapy to explore the roots of my trauma, develop coping mechanisms, and find healthier ways to address the pain. It was a journey of self-discovery and self-compassion, as I learned to love myself and to navigate the complexities of my emotions without numbing them. Throughout this process, I also had to face the fact that some family members were not willing to acknowledge the positive impact that recovery has had on me. Their denial and resistance only added to the difficulty of my recovery. It required me to set boundaries and prioritize my own well-being, even if it meant distancing myself from those who couldn't offer the support I needed. I needed to remove negativity from life. So, I did. In my recovery, I discovered that true healing comes from within. It involves learning to forgive myself for the unhealthy coping mechanisms I had developed, the pain I caused others including my biological family. I have now found healthier ways to address the pain and trauma. I went into Northpoint, I surrounded myself with a supportive network of individuals who understood and validated my experiences, offering encouragement and empathy along the way. Those people are really my family today. In this moment, I am proud to say that I have made significant progress in my recovery. I have developed healthier coping mechanisms, honed my resilience, and learned to face my trauma with courage and compassion. While the impact of childhood trauma will always be a part of my story, I refuse to let it define me or dictate my future. Recovery has taught me that healing is possible, even in the face of deep-seated trauma and the destructive coping mechanisms that once held me captive. By acknowledging the pain, asking for help, and finding healthier ways to cope, I have reclaimed my power and am now traveling the ancient path that those who went before me carved out. A path of love, kindness, humility, self-discovery, growth, and lasting recovery. With love and compassion – you are all miracles.

Effort

07.12.2023 – Effort In my reflection tonight, I am struck by the amount of work and effort required to keep from drowning in the sea of addiction. I left Northpoint in July of 2021 and was welcomed by a group of friends that I will be connected to forever. We had a regular scheduled meeting earlier tonight. It may just be me, but these last few months have seemed to create significant hardship and challenges for many of my friends in the tribe. I began to think about my own recovery and what is required to keep me on the path. The trap for me is looking back and using what happened to define what will happen. There have been times in my recovery journey that I put in a ton of effort and other times when I did not put in enough effort. One thing is for sure, the results I see in myself and in others around me are directly linked to the amount of effort and work put in. For me, recovery demands a comprehensive approach that addresses the physical, psychological, and social aspects of my disease. It is a journey that necessitates hard work, perseverance, and a commitment to pursuing positive change. One crucial aspect of recovery is personal effort. It begins with recognizing the presence of addiction, acknowledging its harmful effects, and committing to take action to create a better lifestyle. This required me to actively engage in treatment programs, participate in therapy sessions, and seek support from groups or networks specifically designed to help me with my disease. By being honest, consistently investing effort and making the conscious choice to not drink, I took the first steps towards my own recovery. For me, recovery also involved addressing the underlying factors contributing to my drinking. This involved examining past traumas, managing my mental health condition, and developing healthier coping mechanisms. It required me to put in the effort to identify triggers, learn new ways to manage stress and emotions, and work a program that fosters positive change. By actively working on personal growth and self-improvement, I broke free from the disease that wants to take everything from me. I strive to create the best version of me. Recovery also entails rebuilding various aspects of our lives. For me, this included changing my environment, restoring relationships, rebuilding trust, and developing a sense of purpose and fulfillment outside of substance use. For some of my friends and family, it involved finding new hobbies, pursuing education or career opportunities, and embracing a happier, healthier lifestyle. By working diligently to repair the damage caused by my disease and proactively creating a supportive and nurturing environment, I believe that I have established a solid foundation for long-term recovery. I want to emphasize that recovery from substance abuse is a complex and individualized process. Just because it’s what worked to help get me better, doesn’t mean it’s the only way to go. Different individuals may require different treatment approaches and support systems. However, regardless of the path chosen, the importance of hard work remains constant. By embracing the significance of hard work in the recovery process, we all can increase our chances of achieving lasting sobriety, personal growth, and overall well-being. With unwavering love and caring.

Natascha's 2 Years

07.12.2023 – For Natascha’s Two-Years I sent this to Natascha. I wanted to take a moment to express how incredibly proud I am of you for reaching this significant milestone of two years in your recovery journey. It is an achievement that deserves to be celebrated and cherished. Reflecting on where you were two years ago, I am astounded by the incredible progress you have made. Overcoming addiction and embarking on the path of recovery is no easy feat, and yet, you have faced the challenges head-on with unwavering determination and strength. Your commitment to healing and growth has been truly inspiring. I can still remember our time in IOP – you have transformed big time, my firnd. It is evident that your recovery has been built upon the foundation of resilience and an unyielding spirit. You have faced difficult moments, navigated through setbacks, and embraced the power of self-discovery. Your dedication to becoming the best version of yourself is awe-inspiring. But it's not just the milestones and accomplishments that make me proud of you. It's the courage you exhibit every day to stay true to your recovery, even when faced with temptations or obstacles. Your perseverance has been remarkable, and it serves as a shining example to others who may be on a similar journey. You always show up! Your determination to break free from the chains of addiction and create a better life for yourself is an incredible testament to your character. Your commitment to growth and self-improvement inspires those around you and reminds us all that change is possible, no matter how challenging it may seem. As you celebrate this two-year milestone, I want you to know that you are not alone. I am here, cheering you on, every step of the way. Your strength and resilience serve as a beacon of hope and a source of inspiration for everyone who knows you. Your journey is a reminder that we can overcome the greatest of obstacles and emerge stronger and more resilient on the other side. Congratulations on this remarkable achievement, my dear Natasha. You have come so far, and I believe in your ability to continue forging a path of recovery, growth, and fulfillment. May each passing day bring you closer to the life you deserve, filled with love, joy, and endless possibilities. With immeasurable pride and admiration

A Poem - The Sea

07.11.2023 – The Sea of Recovery In the realm where land meets sea, A message emerges, subtle and free. Nature's embrace, the ocean's might, Reflects the journey of reclaiming light. Just as waves crash upon the shore, Life's tumultuous tides we can't ignore. Alcohol, a tempestuous brew, Captures hearts, leaving souls askew. But amidst the chaos, hope does rise, Like sun-kissed waves under bright blue skies. Recovery, a beacon, a lighthouse strong, Guiding lost ships, righting all wrongs. The ocean, vast, its depths unknown, Mirrors the soul that seeks to atone. Like the ebb and flow of the tidal dance, Healing whispers within its expanse. With each crashing wave, a lesson taught, A gentle reminder, a wisdom sought. Embracing sobriety, a transformation grand, An awakening, as grains of sand. The Eagles soar, their cries elate, As recovering souls reclaim their fate. They spread their wings, no longer confined, To the depths of addiction, they've left behind. In nature's symphony, a melody pure, An orchestra of life, a spiritual cure. The ocean's whispers, the wind's sweet song, Awaken the spirit, making it strong. The salty air, a breath of rebirth, Healing wounds that once felt cursed. In harmony with nature's gentle sway, A soul blossoms, finding its own way. So let the ocean's metaphor unfold, A testament to strength and stories untold. Recovery, a journey, both fierce and brave, For a time seas are calm, but just for today.

Introspection

07.10.2023 – Self Inventory Today, I want to share a positive message from my heart as I continue my journey of recovery from alcohol addiction. It's a message about the incredible power of taking a personal inventory, inspired by a relapse I experienced along the way. Taking a personal inventory has been a transformative practice during my recovery. It was after a relapse that I realized the need to deeply examine myself, my actions, and the impact my addiction had on my life and the lives of those around me. It was a painful setback, but it became a catalyst for growth and self-reflection. Through this process of personal inventory, I have come to understand that relapse is not a sign of failure but an opportunity for introspection and self-awareness. It allowed me to confront the underlying causes and triggers that caused my relapse. By honestly examining my thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, I have gained valuable insights into the patterns and vulnerabilities that need healing. But here's the remarkable part: taking a personal inventory after a relapse has also revealed my inner strength and determination. It has shown me that setbacks do not define me; rather, they provide an opportunity to learn and grow. Through self-reflection and examination, I have discovered a wellspring of resilience and self-compassion within me. Recovering from addiction is not a journey that can be taken alone. It involves seeking support from loved ones, professional guidance, and perhaps even support groups. However, it is through the practice of personal inventory that I have truly transformed my life. Taking a personal inventory has allowed me to redefine my values, set meaningful goals, and cultivate a genuine connection with my inner self. It has helped me recognize my strengths and identify areas where I can grow and improve. I have unearthed passions and talents that were long forgotten or never fully explored. Each day, I now approach life with a renewed sense of purpose and gratitude. Through the process of personal inventory, I have learned to appreciate the beauty of the present moment. I no longer let relapse discourage me; instead, I view it as an opportunity to deepen my understanding and commitment to recovery. I embrace every experience, whether joyful or challenging, knowing that it is an opportunity for self-discovery and growth. Today, I am filled with gratitude for the transformative power of taking a personal inventory, even in the face of relapse. It has given me the strength to overcome setbacks and embark on a journey of healing and self-discovery. I hope that my story will inspire you to embark on your own path of personal inventory, knowing that within the depths of self-examination lies the key to unlocking a future filled with hope, resilience, and genuine fulfillment.

A Sponsor

07.09.2023 As I reflect tonight, I am filled with gratitude for the incredible gift of having time with a sponsor and embracing a Higher Power in my life. The combined impact of these relationships has been nothing short of transformative, and today as I continue to search for a new sponsor, I want to share with you the profound significance of having a sponsor, working the 12 steps, and embracing a Higher Power in my life. When I first stepped through the doors of Northpoint, I was consumed by fear, doubt, and a deep sense of isolation. Addiction had stripped away my self-worth, leaving me broken and uncertain about the path ahead. I had no feelings – I was an empty shell that desperately wanted to stop drinking. I was welcomed with warmth, love, and a ton of grace. As I sobered up and began to think more clearly, I embraced the people and the process. I loved my time in-patient. I used to ride the elevator every morning because it was a sure-fire way to meet, greet, and love on all the incoming people that were probably feeling the same way I did when I arrived. My coin out was tough – I had built better relationships in my short time there than I had in years. I became an advocate for step work during my time in IOP. I was haphazardly white knuckling it until a friend in IOP encouraged me to try the steps. So, I did. The moment I found a sponsor, a glimmer of hope illuminated began to illuminate my path. Simultaneously, embracing a Higher Power inviting me to rebuild that fractured relationship and recognize that my higher power was always there, a loving and compassionate energy that I could turn to for strength and guidance. It was through this Higher Power that I surrendered my pride, my need for control, and my belief that I alone had the answers. I humbly acknowledged that I was part of something bigger and tapped into a wellspring of divine wisdom and grace. Having a sponsor and embracing a Higher Power was like having guardian angels on this arduous journey. They could see right through the camouflage of my excuses, my justifications, and my self-destructive tendencies. Always holding me accountable, gently but firmly, so that I could break free from the chains of addiction. Not having a sponsor today is a gap in my working the program – an important element that is required to help me see the forest through the trees and provide a time-tested methodology for recovery and living. I learnt that the gift of a sponsor and a Higher Power is not limited to the confines of meetings; it extended far beyond that sacred space. They became my guides through the challenges of everyday life. In moments of temptation, doubt, or despair, they offered their hands, reminding me of the tools I had acquired and the strength I possessed within. My higher power would speak directly to my heart through my sponsor many times. I learnt that sobriety was not just abstinence from alcohol; it was a way of living, a blueprint for life, a journey towards self-discovery, service, and personal growth. Having a sponsor and embracing a Higher Power is a testament to the power of human connection and the transformative nature of faith. They believe in me when I struggle to believe in myself. They celebrate my progress, no matter how small, and inspire me to reach for the stars. They constantly remind me that recovery is possible, that I am deserving of a better life, and that my past does not define my future. I honor the past, but I don’t live in it now. They also remind me often that recovery is hard and requires hard work. It is a program of action and talk is cheap. I need this in my life to keep me moving forward and to avoid complacency. Remember, my dear friends, we are not alone on this journey. We have each other, and with love and guidance, we can conquer the depths of addiction and soar to new heights of serenity, joy, and fulfillment. Our cups can be filled with goodness, kindness, and compassion. In solidarity and with boundless hope and love.